Hedges

So I was talking to Makay yesterday - a session. Those are certainly enlightening. She mentioned that my life may have a few more hedges in the future, that it may not be as easy - at least in some senses - as it has been.

I guess I should back up there. I'm very grateful for where I am. My relationship with Julie is pretty close to perfection. She is my center. She knows me and loves me, and accepts me, and inspires me to be all I can be. My relationship with the kids is improving - I have failed all of them, and done poorly in my choices with them in the past, but they see me love them without judgment and I think they appreciate that. After making such a life changing decision so many years ago, they have good justification to fear and doubt, but I and we are showing them love. I believe it was worth it.

I have my health, I have great neighbors and friends, I'm growing in my soul and feeling my spiritual strength grow. I even live in the awesomest place on earth. It's gorgeous here in Saratoga on the lake. The area speaks peace to me. Julie is making great money and will be making more soon. My business looks like it will do really well - my life is a series of gifts like christmas in daddy warbuck's house.

So back to hedges. She mentioned that there may be a few more hedges in my life in the future. If that's what the Lord needs to place there, I choose to see hedges as a gift - as guidance. If I'm told "you can't go there", then I know it's because I need to go somewhere else.

I had thought that hedges were like walls, placed in the way to keep you from where you need to go. Based on that, I chose to read the passages from the scriptures that talk about hedges. One of them is in Mosiah 7, verse 29.

"For behold, the Lord hath said: I will not succor my people in the day of their transgression; but I will hedge up their ways that they prosper not; and their doings shall be as a stumbling block before them"

I think that hedges can be placed by ourselves, by the adversary, or by the Lord. When placed by the Lord, they mark the path. They show us "don't go this way" and then we get to find another way - the path the Lord would have us take.

And everyone gets the opportunity to face difficulties - it's what life is about. Facing and overcoming stuff makes us grow, and without it we will have wasted much of what our live should be.

Perhaps the hedges that we put in front of ourselves, or that Satan does, may be the same thing. Maybe I've been a meth addict and spent all my money - I know I should go to church but I feel guilty, have no money for clothes, and I might believe the church would fall down if I went in. All of these are hedges that Satan has created, and I have accepted, that keep me from going to church. These are not good hedges, and they don't show the path. They are there because I stopped growing tomatoes and allowed the thorn patch to thrive. Wading through these hedges won't be fun, but the Lord has a power lawn mower. He can make the path much easier if we let him.

Verse 33 is approaching the level of testimony that might put it in my blog about great men's testimonies. "But if ye will turn to the Lord with full purpose of heart, and put your trust in him, and serve him with all diligence of mind, if ye do this, he will, according to his own will and pleasure, deliver you out of bondage.

We place ourselves in thorny patches, hedges on all sides, no escape path. This is not the Lord - it's not anybody but ourselves. By ourselves, it's hopeless, but it isn't hopeless. The Lord has the trimmer/backhoe/bulldozer that gets through hedges with ease. The instructions are full purpose of heart, diligence, and faith that the Lord will do it when the Lord sees it's time. Once again, the Lord isn't a McDonalds order clerk, we don't place orders in our prayers and drive to the next window expecting results. We do our part and have faith and patience that the Lord will take it from there when the Lord decides to do so. This is what he did for the people of Limhi in this chapter of Mosiah.

As for me, and for now, I welcome the hedges. As long as I am reading the scriptures, writing from my soul here, loving my wife, kids and grandkids, and serving as well as I can, the hedges will be considered gifts. They will guide me and grow me, and I hope that I can be grateful for both.