Meaningless miracles

I think I'm like everybody else. Wouldn't it be nice if God could just bail us out

miraculously every time things got hard? If I'm low on money, or if I need a new car, could I just find a gold brick on the front porch that says "congratulations - this is your gift today from God".

Wouldn't it be nice if He could do that sort of thing? Think of how much easier my life would be? Except that he better not give my neighbors more gifts and miracles than me - that would really piss me off. What if I got a new car - a lambo maybe - and what if my neighbor got a house? How would that be fair? Wow, God must really be an unfair being - playing favorites and all.

OK, so I went down a road that's not going to happen, because their are no free gold bricks, free cars or free houses - at least that I'm directly aware of. But it does indicate that our own greed and self centered nature can prevent us from being grateful for the gifts and miracles that are and were sent our way.

We've all seen this scene as well: we pray earnestly for a miracle. It happens, and then we say, "well, I guess aunt Janie healed up after all" or "thank goodness we got that lucky break/service from neighbor Joe. He's a really good guy".

The Nephites were good at it too. 3 Nephi 1 talks about the run-up to the birth of the Savior. It had been predicted that on this day, there would be a day, night & day with no night. In the meantime, there were miracles happening, but not this particular one yet. Other miracles were blown off, because they weren't THE miracle that had been predicted. "4...there began to be greater signs and greater miracles wrought among the people", but hey - if it ain't THE miracle, it doesn't count, right? "6 And they began to rejoice over their brethren, saying: behold the time is past, and the words of Samuel are not fulfilled; therefore, your joy and your faith concerning this thing hath been in vain."

Man, I hate it when others are joyful. Now that really ruins my day.

But spreading it heavy on the believers got old. They're still joyful after I abuse them. How to deal with this if I'm a non believer and they're still happy? Easy - I just set a date to kill them. "9...there was a day set apart by the unbelievers, that all those who believed in those traditions should be put to death except the sign should come to pass."

So, as the story goes, the unbelievers were foiled again. The proper miracle happens. Do they decide then to become saints and followers of all things joyful? You guessed it. "there began to be lyings sent forth among the people by Satan, to harden their hearts."

More miracles happened. Been there, done that. Miracles are routine now, and they get dismissed. The unbelievers  in "3 Nephi 2:2  began to be less and less astonished at a sign or a wonder from heaven...and began to disbelieve all which they had heard and seen".

It seems to me that miracles don't really make much difference in the long run. If I have a poisonous or a poisoned soul, I will choose to stay there. It's the sewage pit that I have selected for myself, and absolutely nobody is going to pull me out of it. This is the state of the Nephites shortly after Christ's birth in Jerusalem.

It nearly finished them. In the greatest moment of time - Christ's life here on earth - the Nephites were almost made extinct before their visit by Christ here, and caused it by their own evil nature. The many miracles exhibited at the time appear to have made no difference at all.

We can look at our own lives through this prism. As inhabitants of our world and our country, does our culture kill freedom? People? Do my personal choices kill my body? Do they kill my spirit? Have I cut off the divine guidance and yes, miracles, that Christ is waiting to give me?

I suspect it's better to live in the warm daily embrace of God than to have a gold

brick delivered daily. Better to live in love among others around us, to build and be built by them, than live in a house that's a few thousand square feet bigger. Better to anticipate death and a reunion with my loved ones, and with my beautiful Redeemer, than to live with fear and loathing about the end of my days on earth. Better to be gently guided by those on the other side who wish to help me, than to feel alone. It's not an empty world, full of hateful, selfish, angry outsiders, unless I chose to become one of them.

I can surround myself with light and become a lighthouse of my own. And in doing so, the light I reflect, and the light reflected back to me will fill my soul.

That's a miracle.

About bondage and miracles

It's an easy thought, and one we have all felt: "I wish the Lord would just make this easier on me - why can't he just cause a miracle to happen so I can be proven right when I'm dealing with non believers?"

"Why can't he just cause a miracle to happen so my aunt can be freed from cancer?"

"Why can't the Lord send an angel, or cause something super awesome to happen so I could convince my teenager to stop doing those things and straighten up his life?"

"Why can't there be a sign for me? I'd love to have a miracle or two in my life!"

"My child is in pain, and so am I. As a part of the things I have done wrong, she has chosen decisions that are destroying her body and spirit. She will die young, her children will be without a mother, she shows problems that could have been so easily prevented. She rejects the Lord, who could have helped her through her problems, or prevented everything. Her pain is mine, and it really is like an eternal flame. Why can't there be a miracle for her?"

"My grandchild is in the hospital. He's so young and doesn't even understand the pain he is feeling. He is too young to know what pain is, and too young to know that we love him, too young to know we are helpless to comfort him. In a time when he should be loved, held and warmed in a blanket, all we can do is touch his feet and talk to him - knowing that he can't understand us. His pain is his alone, and we can't help. Why can't there be a miracle?"

Our wish for a quick fix, a miracle, is human. It would all be so much easier if it was easier. This is not unique to our age, nor is it unique to believers and unbelievers. In Alma chapter 30, Korihor was the guy who thought he was smarter than, and used words to deceive. His thing was that you couldn't know that Christ would come. His words and message was that you can't know about what's going to happen - because it hasn't happened yet. While his words were about appearing smarter and above the believers, I suspect his motive was to gain admiration and followers, then live the lifestyle he wanted. He cared little for the people he was leading away, and was about getting a position and a lifestyle for himself. It appears to me that if he had to lead thousands to an inner death, despair and emptiness, that was fine for him as long as he was their leader.

Korihor was brought before the prophet, and he wanted a sign. Alma 30:48 "...I say that ye do not know that there is a God; and except ye show me a sign, I will not believe"

So Alma, the prophet at the time, was able to call down a sign. Korihor was struck speechless. Then he admits, via writing, that he was wrong. "OK" he says basically "I get it - that was a sign. Now fix me." And Alma responds "I don't think you would change your ways, but we'll leave that up to the Lord." And the Lord in his infinite wisdom - doesn't fix him. It's not about the signs we get or don't get, it's about who we are.

Korihor wasn't about being right or wrong in the matter, he was about using a message to make himself famous - admired among his followers. This whole inability to speak thing would put a huge dent in his ability to do that.

Word spread, and the same people that followed him and his message rejected him. They had heard of the miracle too, but they could still talk, and now K was an embarrassment. They still wanted to believe their beliefs - the ones that K had been teaching them - the ones that had been proven wrong. So now he was inconvenient. He went to the center of what had been his base to try to get enough support to survive, and they killed him by running over him. His miracle, while undeniable to them, wasn't their miracle - they didn't want to acknowledge that miracle because it would have required them to change their beliefs and actions. So - the evidence was discarded and executed. Not by the believers in the church, but by the people who had formerly worshiped him. These same people would have asked for a sign themselves and said they would believe. They got one from their leader. No change. The Lord knew this would happen of course.

And perhaps this is why we don't always get a miracle when we wish for one. Sometimes the hard stuff is there so we can come out on the other side strengthened. Perhaps the Lord needs us to overcome hard stuff, and sometimes what we perceive to be hard so we can know eventually that we can overcome. And sometimes things get hard because our choices cause a hard life. In any case, really choosing the Lord can ease our burden to a level we can manage.

I just started singing in ward choir. This is a huge step for me because I'm very uncomfortable singing even in my basement - let alone in front of people. I can't read music and I try to remember if that note in the line means it's a G or C. It's been too long since 8th grade band class. But the song we sang was "Cast thy burdens upon the Lord, and he will sustain thee." It's a beautiful song and I did manage to learn the base for it. That's a minor miracle by itself. The other miracle though, is that it really works. We really can drop our burdens at his feet. We can drop as much of it as we're willing to let him have. And he will take it.

That's a miracle.

It takes faith. It takes belief, hope and action. It takes faith to let go of our
burdens - often we want to keep that pain because it's our own. It's who we are, and as much as we say we want to lose it, we may just be uncomfortable without it. We have to allow the Savior to be our Savior.

"Behold, I stand at the door and knock"

The greatest job pays nothing at all

We all go to work every day - the routine looks the same. For me back in the day,

I'd take the same commute through the same traffic, sit in the same cubicle with the same coworkers with the same lame jokes. I'd put in my time, then do battle with traffic, and come home exhausted to my children who wanted to play. All too often, I had nothing left for them. What a tragedy that was.

Now, the routine is different. As a home inspector, I follow Siri to wherever she takes me. Different door, same procedure. Different buyers. Same drainage issues. Same roof issues. Same furnace issues. Sometimes I rattle off my paragraphs without even thinking about them. It's like being a dentist in a way - you never get promoted and your job description never changes. The stuff you do on day 1 of your job is much like what you do the day before retirement. When I let it be that routine, it can be very monotonous.

There has to be more to life than this, right? What if life could be fulfilling? What if you could come home energized instead of exhausted?

I'm reading in Alma 30 today. Alma is the prophet and chief judge of his people, the Nephites. He is accused of getting rich because of his position as the earthly leader of the church. His response to the accusation is in Alma 30:33-34. "And notwithstanding the many labors which I have performed in the church, I have never received so much as even one senine (call it a dollar) for my labor... 34 And now, believest thou that we deceive this people, that causes such joy in their hearts?"

I dare say that as he was able to guide people toward happiness, it caused joy in his heart as well. And this is why he did it. The best things in life are not only free, but we don't get paid for them either.

But what if I can't just leave my job and go be a missionary for Christ? Does that mean I'm consigned to this misery we call life's routine? The answer that I see is beautiful: we can all do it, regardless of who we are or what we do. I can live to serve. On my commutes to wherever, I can use the time to fill my soul with stuff that I know will lift me. Then when I'm wherever I go, I can lift others and further fill my soul. In my cubicle, I could grumble about my office and be surly to those who I see, or I could take any available opportunity to lift & serve those who come to me - not just to provide the answers, but lift others.

Had I done that back in the day, I might have had more energy for my daughters. This is something that will haunt me until the day I die.

Nonetheless, here I am, and I find that when I really serve - not just do what I

gotta do for the money - it lifts me. I come home more energized than I started, and it gives meaning to my life.

In Dead Poets Society, Robin Williams mentioned something like "poetry isn't what you do as a living, it's why you live". That was rather deep and it was something I remembered. Service is in the same category. When what we really do has no price, the rewards are priceless. May we seek for that.




#Alma30:34
#Service
#bestjobs

Yeah, that's unpleasant

Have you ever wondered what the end of it all is going to look like? Will it be 10,000 worldwide tornadoes, or a firestorm where 10,000 fiery comets smash the earth at the same time? And how many seconds or minutes before that moment will the righteous be taken up?

I had an old girlfriend that was really into the last days. She mentioned it multiple times per day, and lived with a constant fear. I saw it a bit differently. In any case, if you have a curiosity, there are scriptural accounts of it that are must-read stuff.


The end of days

So we're getting toward the end of the chapter in Doctrine and Covenants 133 verse 62. The Lord has explained that there were times when he took his word away, and now he's talking about what happens to those who repent and sanctify themselves before the Lord. This is all happy stuff.

Being cut off

But verse 63 takes a turn. "And upon them that hearken not to the voice of the Lord ... they shall be cut off from among the people".

So wait - from among the people? Is this members of the church? Is this those that might say they follow the Father? Being cut off in other scriptures sounds like being excommunicated.

Again, the Lord shows the ability to carefully craft words - at least as viewed by me. He doesn't say he cuts that person off, he says that person is cut off. Who does the cutting? The person or people themselves. They cut themselves off as they cut themselves out. This tells me that if you are cut off, don't blame the Lord for being mean - blame yourself for taking yourself out of the shepherd's flock.

It's the saints

Verse 66 backs up the concept that we're talking about the saints here. "In that day when I came unto mine own, no man among you received me." and 67 backs this up again. In these verses, we're talking about the saints. verses 72 and 73 make it sound even worse - for those who once called themselves saints.

Don't not hearken

So, with that terrifying warning, I go back to the original verse. What does it mean to not hearken to the voice of the Lord? Once again, I am sure there are a million layers to that. Not listening to the Lord's leaders would probably be one of them. Choosing to rebel against the Lord after having received whatever level of confirmation, perhaps because the church and its teachings become inconvenient or perhaps politically incorrect, unpopular or not parallel with a person's selected lifestyle. Or - perhaps just not listening because that stuff isn't interesting or perceived to be relevant to a superficial life style.

What does it mean to not listen to the voice of the Lord? One of those layers for me might be this: when provided guidance by the spirit of God, I must listen. This means that if I get a message to get in my car, drive down the street to the north, take two rights and look for the man in the driveway, I must follow that. Is that uncomfortable? Sure is. It really is. The question is, will I follow the Lord or will I follow my fears?

On a side note, I know of a person who desperately loves a girl. He spends a whole lot of his time thinking of her. They are perfect for each other. They are so drawn to each other, and time doesn't change any of that - time has happened.

But based on results, he is more set on his chosen lifestyle than he loves her. This is a lifestyle that has netted him little, and left him an angry and lonely man. Yet he won't abandon that - even for the woman who appears to the one that completes him. I believe that he has chosen his vices over his happiness.

Vices vs happiness?

We all do that, to some extent. We choose our vices, our pain, our loneliness, because it's ours. And we reject the Lord and his love, his happiness, his balance to life, his soul filling lifestyle because that's not how we've defined ourselves. Yes, I do it too. We all do.

If Joseph Smith actually had written this book himself, he certainly had very different writing styles - the Book of Mormon could not have been written more differently than this book. Section 133 is written powerfully and technically. As always, little words are found that make a great difference in what can be drawn, and the layers of meaning - at least the ones I can see - are many. This book reads like a technical manual, but the power of the words is at a level that I believe no human could create. The power of the text fills my soul.

May we all get better at following the Lord. Recognizing and following his voice, and giving up our pain for his love.

Eric Clapton would have wanted to know

I remember Eric Clapton's song about one his children that had died early. It was a heartfelt, soulful song, wondering if he would know his child on the other side. If the little boy would know him, or if they would just be cloud like spirits, floating around, that were not really aware of other cloud spirits around them. His song reaches into the depths of his pain as a father who has lost his 4 year old son. "Will I know your name if I saw you in heaven; would it be the same if I saw you in heaven?"

It was while reading today that I ran into  D&C 130 verse 2: "And that same sociality which exists among us here will exist among us there, only it will be coupled with eternal glory..."

Eric would be relieved. I don't know what kind of life he really lived - a rock star's life is not known to follow the straightest of paths, and I understand that he had problems with an alcohol addiction, but none of us can guess how he will be judged. I suspect he will be judged with his gifts and capacities on one hand, and what he was able to accomplish with those gifts on the other. My suspicion is that the quality or sales volume of his music is much less important than how he used his gifts to improve the lives of others. But - that's the Lord's department.

What we do know is that he will absolutely know his child in heaven. The same love will exist, and the relationship can start with that love, then grow together. Will it be the same? Hopefully as they continue to grow their relationship, it won't be the same. It will be better. If he's done it right, as judged by the Lord and by himself, it will be coupled with a level of eternal glory.

The end of it

So I'm not feeling like writing, and nothing reached out and grabbed me today, but I feel like I need to write. So here I am, obeying.

The reading today is the JS translation of Matthew 1. This is end of days stuff - it reminds me of someone I knew back in high school. She was living in fear of the end, and I always found that a bit odd. This chapter lays out a lot of nasty stuff, but the prize that comes at the end sounds like it's worth it. It kinda makes me think that some of us would rather focus on the ugly wrapping paper, while choosing to place much less focus on the awesome present inside the box.

In verses 25 through 27, the Lord tells us how it's going to play out. There will be false Christs everywhere - I ran into a few of them while in Guatemala and El Salvador on my mission. Some guy who posted an 8.5 x 11 on the power poles in the street, and said he'd be in a soccer stadium on some future date. Yeah, that's not how Christ is going to do it.

25: Wherefore, if they shall say unto you: behold he is in the desert; go not forth; Behold he is in the secret chambers; believe it not. 26 For as the light of the morning cometh out of the east, and shineth even unto the west, and covereth the whole earth, so shall also the coming of the Son of Man be.

So when Christ comes as a second coming, it looks like it will be like the sunrise. Nobody can fake a sunrise. No dude with a strobe light can match a sunrise. It will be clear.

Now of course, I'm sure that Christ visits people with whatever regularity he chooses. Does he visit his prophets and apostles? I don't know, but if I were guessing I'd say yes. Does he visit others? I don't know, but I'm not going to start writing rules for the Lord to obey. If he decides to visit aunt May, then he can do that regardless of what my opinion is on the subject. For me though, if he visits
Aunt May, then his visit is for Aunt May. If he wants to guide the church, he goes to his assigned prophet. If he wants to guide Aunt May, he goes to Aunt May.

If Aunt May tells me that the Lord in the local soccer stadium next week, pretty good chance I'll be busy that day.

So - I don't know who this post is for, but apparently it needed to be written on someone's behalf. Like I say, usually I write about something that inspires me while I'm reading scriptures. Today, it was basically that I feel inspired to write after reading the scriptures - but not specifically about one particular verse.

If it's you that I wrote this for - then take it as a gift. There are others the Lord has for you when you've consumed what you can from this one.

Perspective

So I picked up my scriptures today, a bit saddened that I'm done with what I consider to be my scriptural passion - the gifts and mysteries of God. I picked another subject, but then I couldn't do it. Back to just book of Mormon reading for me - at least for now. I love the tone, the simplicity, and the spiritual power of the words.

So it turns out that the man Mormon, for whom the Book of Mormon is named after, also had a father named Mormon. He was Mormon jr - not something I knew before. A meaningless fact for sure, but hey - it's new to me.

As I'm reading this, I'm thinking "who in the pre-existence (spiritual life before this mortal life) would have wanted or volunteered to be Mormon? It had to be someone very strong spiritually, but such a person might want instead to be born in more spiritual, more gifted times, when the spirit of the Lord is spread out among the people, and he simply has to guide them forward? Who would volunteer to be the leader of a people who would not be lead forward? His role for the vast majority of his life was to sit atop the crowd and watch them die. Like a birds eye view of a train wreck. Only this train wreck was the destruction of an entire race of people.

In what might be one of the biggest understatements in the history of the world, Mormon states "And I, being fifteen years of age and somewhat of a sober mind..." " ...notwithstanding I being young, was large in stature, therefore the people of Nephi appointed me that I should be their leader, or the leader of their armies". (Mormon 1:16 and Mormon 2:1)

Yeah. It was because he was a big guy. I don't think so. It was because they knew that they had always done well when they had a man of God as their leader. The irony and their downfall was that this time, they put the man in the leadership slot, but they didn't follow his advice. In a way, it's a false religion to say "yeah - we're the good guys - just look at that thing over there. That proves we're God's team".

It's not the thing over there. It's us. It's our lives and who we are. When asked about God in our life and the power of our own personal structure, the person who answers must not point to anywhere but his own soul as proof of being a follower. No statue, no exterior person, no idol, no display, no lumping yourself in with others in a group under any name will be adequate to the Lord or to your own soul. I am who I am because of who I am. Not because I have an idol in my home, or because I use concocted words and phrases that my friends use. Those also may be idols. It may be true that anything that diverts me away from a focus on the strength of my soul and my relationship with my Savior is an idol. As such, any time spent on that idol will not help me at best, and at worst it will cancer my soul.

So as viewed from this corner today, Mormon became somewhat of an idol to the people he led. This is not his fault - he was a true prophet of God. It was the fault of the people he wanted to lead. I thought Mormon 1:16 was powerful "And I did endeavor to preach unto this people, but my mouth was shut, and I was forbidden that I should preach unto them". How sad and enlightening is it to know that people get to a point where the Lord knows that they're better off when they are not preached to, or given gifts or mysteries, because he knows that the gift will be ignored, mistreated, misused or abused. The Lord knows such a gift given would then cause further condemnation on judgment day.

So he allows Mormon to sit on his horse as a leader, and give rousing speeches, and point a direction, but the Lord and Mormon know it's all in vain. They will die because they prefer death to living in the sunshine of a spiritual life. Those people certainly don't exist today, right?

And in Mormon 2:12, Mormon, ever the hopeful leader, sees his people lamenting. With an eye that must have reflected God's vision, he was thrilled about it. He thought something like this: "Finally my people might be turning the corner, lamenting their lives, and ready to follow the Lord once again". He knew the Lord would have been merciful and long suffering. 13 "But behold this my joy was vain, for their sorrowing was not unto repentance...but it was rather the sorrow of the damned, because the Lord would not always suffer them to take happiness in sin"

The Lord's eyes are not our own. Sometimes he gains hope when we have gone down the wrong path and find ourselves in a mud pit. He hopes that we'll decide the mud pit isn't entertaining, and change our path. How terribly disappointing must it be to the Lord when we basically tell him "look, I hate this pit that my life is in, but it's still my choice - and I refuse to allow you to bring light and joy into my life"

Regardless of how well we might think we're doing in our life, the occasional mud pit may be an opportunity to look to God and live. May we do so.