Lesson 14: Ye shall be a peculiar treasure

Lesson 14 this week is, to me, a lesson about all of us as followers. It's about strengthening ourselves as followers, so that our leaders can be strengthened to lead properly.

Many of us have felt that moment: you get asked to do something that you know is way over your head. Maybe it's nursery leader, maybe it's young women's president. Maybe it's the bishopric. You don't feel ready. You feel inadequate and undersized. You know you, and you know your inadequacies. You know your sins and weaknesses - certainly someone else has a better resume than you. Right? But you also understand that the person providing the call to you is a representative of the Lord.

Yes, you're inadequate for that job or calling. Of course you are. That's fine though - the Lord makes up the difference if we'll let him.

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The same is true of Moses. One of the greatest prophets ever, was he inadequate for the job? Absolutely, and the Lord knew that, was fine with that, and worked with that. A passage in Exodus 17:8-13 describes how two men, who we could think of perhaps as counselors, or perhaps simply as members of the church, helped Moses do what Moses couldn't by himself. He had a staff to hold up, and as long as it was up, Moses' fighting men prevailed. The problem is that no man can hold that up all day long - it's humanly impossible, even for a legend like Moses. But if he lowered it, his men would die and his army began to lose the battle. It had to be up.

The answer? Get two strong men around Moses to help him lift. They didn't and couldn't take Moses' burden from him, but they helped him lift.

This goes me back to moments in my life when I heard someone say that the bishop was not up to the job, or that someone else was doing it wrong. Was the complainer right? Technically yes, perhaps. But they were so wrong. You make a leader strong not by complaining about his inability to carry the staff, but by lifting him or her, and easing their load. Love and service, not griping and complaining.

The Israelites did this at another time as well. Moses had just gotten them through the red sea. Is this enough to have them revere him as a man of God and treasured leader forever? Nope. Was it enough that the Lord fed them for free? Nope. Manna, quail and water weren't enough. They apparently wanted pizza. Can't the Lord that makes manna happen send down pizza occasionally? And on Saturdays, can't we get maybe some nice sushi? If it's all the same to the Lord, we're bored of manna! Oh - and if it's pizza, not Little Caesar's. We want pizza hut.

But Moses and the Lord wouldn't do that. This kind of reminds me of people following Christ, not because they recognized him as the Savior of their soul, but because he came with free food. And when the free food stops being tasty enough, our gratitude for it wanes, and we demand more.

This reminds me of politics. We as a human race haven't changed that much. We're a bunch of takers - still.

So now, without pizza on the menu, the Israelites start complaining about Moses. You can imagine the signs and posters: "Where's the beef?!", "No pizza, no respect!", "No sushi, no sunday!"

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The Lord called them a peculiar treasure. They are peculiar all right. Treasure? Only the Lord can see that. I just see demanding and annoying. I guess I don't have the Lord's viewpoint. It's good he loves them. I'm sure I annoy him as well - often.

This of course isn't a reflection on Moses - he is what he is. It's a reflection on those who call themselves God's chosen people. They prove their lesser-ness. They add to the weight their leader must carry.

If our leaders are imperfect, if they are flagging, it's time to step in. Not to complain, but to love, lift, and serve. We can't take their calling from them, but we can lovingly assist. In this way, we can build ourselves so that our own load is easier to carry.

We can be a lighthouse, not only to those who are less than in some way, but to everyone. To those who have bigger callings and heavier loads, we can also reflect God's light. May we do so.

Which is the better motivator? Darkness or light?

I met a person on the internet a few years ago - an accident had put this physically healthy individual in a wheelchair. As far as I could tell, it would be his condition for life. To say he was angry would be an understatement. He was somewhere south of bitter. He blamed god, and vented his anger about his condition to anyone and everyone. As a random stranger to him, I got an earful from him as well. It had been, if I remember correctly, a couple of years since the accident.

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I remember reading a book where the author was a scientist, again this was a number of years ago. He described his philosophy that life for human kind was intended to be barely tolerable. Not good by any means, but tolerable enough to just barely stay above the suicide line. He believed that his philosophy was science, and that his viewpoint on life was similar to that of all humanity.

The anger and despair these people feel, and so many others like them, is normal to them. It is justifiable to them, based on "facts" that these individuals choose to see, but life doesn't have to be that way. We can choose the life that we live, at least in terms of what matters most.

So I'm following along in my study of light. This time in 3 Nephi 10. Previously, you had the Nephites that were evil in nature at the time. They were waiting for the day/night/day miracle. Other signs that had been prophesied of happened, but they pinned their hopes on one: the day/night/day thing. "If that doesn't happen" they said "then it's all false and we'll kill the believers". All in on one thing - or so they said. Then the day/night/day thing happened. Did they turn into believers on the spot? Of course not - that would mess with their chosen belief set and lifestyle. So they decided it was trickery or whatever, and kept being who they had always been.

The miracles didn't inspire them. The miracle they said they were looking for happened - no change. What would it take? What does the Lord have to do to turn them (or us) around?

So then He tried darkness. The opposite of the day/night/day thing happened. Darkness for 3 days. No lights. No candles, no torches. Darkness. My claustrophobia would have turned me into a melted mess on the ground. It alone might have killed me.

The scene included mists of darkness, earthquakes, heavy weather, landslides, etc. Numerous large cities were burned, sunk or buried. It seems that the Lord got creative in different ways to destroy so much of this evil civilization. All of this sounds thoroughly unpleasant to me, but honestly, I'd perhaps rather be buried or sunk rather than endure 3 days surrounded by dark nothingness. Frightening.

Did this result in positive changes? Yep. It did help, I'm sure, that much of the evil population was exterminated. Funny what having your evil neighbor turned into toast can do to your own motivations.

Christ ended the 3 day event when his voice became clear to all. For whatever crazy reason, the people listened this time. And then they became one of the happiest, most righteous people ever to populate the earth.

So the day/night/day event, which was a miracle, and which was an undeniable testimony of Christ's light did nothing. But darkness, tempest, death and destruction turned out to be quite a motivator. Good thing that doesn't happen to us in these days - we always turn toward the light when we are invited toward it - right?

The Lord would rather guide us into and through his light than send us the darkness. But I believe that the bottom line is that sometimes love and light don't do the trick - and the Lord must send darkness to teach us what we need to know. Of course, darkness doesn't mean that we're doing things wrong, but it might mean that perhaps is we study the darkness, and learn from it what we can, that we can re-enter the light.

I believe that the first rule in being our parent is that the Lord loves us. Because this is the case, he will do whatever is necessary to teach us, to move us forward, to help us improve. Our negative choices move us toward darkness - that's not the Lord's fault, it's ours. Our lack of choosing light also may tie the Lord's hands. May we choose Light.

Miracles aren't enough

Have you ever been in that bible bash with someone of another religion, where you feel like you pull out that perfect scriptural reference, where use your life experiences and your knowledge of God to put things together as perfectly as possible? Where you testify what you have learned by the power of the spirit and it was poetically beautiful? Where you feel like you've done the very best you can, with help from the other side. Yeah - that moment. And you look at the person you're trying to teach/help/bash with, and you see they gained nothing from it.

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They were waiting for you to finish talking, so they could continue the argument. The best you can hope for is to do so well on a subject that they change the subject to one that they believe they can more successfully argue against you. The worst case - well, the worst case probably results in you understanding that you have cast your pearls before swine. You've given up the pearls, the swine are not benefitted, and now you and the pearls are covered in manure. All you have done is get dirty.

I've felt like that before. I realize that after one of these sessions, not only do I feel like I need to take a shower from the angry emotions I feel, but also I need to check my own intellect: why would a person willingly waddle into a swamp to mud wrestle with a pig? You just know you're going to get dirty, and the pig will enjoy it. Why do we do that? It's not love - not if we know what the outcome will be. I think it's pride.

Self reliance is self failure. Not relying on the Lord - and following his counsel - is pretty much always failure. Guaranteed. We're not perfect individuals, so our best laid plans are imperfect, and will be imperfectly executed.

But what if during that bible bash moment I was able to do something really super awesome? Call down an angel! Or get a meteor to smash right behind his head while he's making a point? Then he'd get it, right?

So here I am, reading in 3 Nephi. The Nephites were pretty much all wicked at this point, and it took Samuel the Lamanite to call them all to repentance. He had authorization to prophesy a variety of "signs and wonders", the greatest of which was a day, night and day with no darkness. Five years from now, he says. So the signs and wonders happen. Does this fix the Nephites? Nope. They get used to them. "It wasn't the day/night/day thing, so it doesn't count" is their response. The day comes when 5 years is up. Signs and wonders? Check. Day/night/day? Not check. They decide to put all the believers to death on the 5 years and 1 day mark. It's the only sign that they're going to count.

Then the moment happens. Night is day. Does this convert them? A few - for a while, but no. If conversion is a dedication to turn our hearts and souls to him, it was a waste of miracles. Did it help the believers? What was the benefit of all those signs, wonders and miracles? Only the Lord has that answer. Was it worth it? God did it, and he has that answer too. It's not mine to attempt to answer that question. He is the only perfect judge.

The light that I do gather from this story though, is that of light. On the night of Christ's birth in Jerusalem, he chose to signal his birth using light. This goes me back to him referring himself to being light. "I am the light of the world". The bright night indicates that light has come to earth, that darkness is at the mercy of light, and that the great Light of the universe controls everything.

Back to the evil folk: did they turn from their evil and become saints? Nope, not even after the one event that they placed all their bets on. This reinforces to me that as a human race, we are not really looking for truth. We're instead looking for confirmation that what we're doing is OK. That's the general rule for humanity. Disciples of God need to change that.

So if miracles don't turn us toward the light, what does? God poured a pile of miracles on the Nephites. As the eternal and perfect judge, he poured enough on them to be more than clear, without doing more than was adequate - any more than what should have been enough would probably just result in further condemnation to the unwilling receiver.

But what turns us toward the light? We do. God does. It's not the meteor that hits the bible bash partner that turns him, it's not our super awesome debate skills. It's not our superior intellect, or our knowledge and memory of just the right scriptures. It's also not about the lack thereof. Instead of memorizing bible bash scriptures, perhaps some of that time can be spent strengthening our soul, so we can more effectively invite others toward Christ. To be the light reflected - the lighthouse - and to make sure our own gaze and hope is not directed toward more knowledge, more ego, more skills, but more reliance on Christ.

I believe that all gifts we have are to be found, cultivated, grown, harvested and shared abundantly. The ability to communicate (what I call the gift of Aaron) and knowledge are beautiful. Like all gifts, they should be developed lest we find ourselves on judgment day, and be found to have hidden our gifts. That said, those gifts are means to serve. Not the end. May we all look to Christ. Everything else will fail.

Lesson 13: Bondage, passover and exodus

It's one of those parts of being human: we look around ourselves and see the greatness in others. That friend is so much smarter than me. This friend seems to always have such great confidence that he can manage pretty much anything. This friend has such great spiritual power. This one has such a great relationship with his wife and kids. That would be paradise. If only I could have a sliver of what they have, I might be able to manage - but I don't. Life is hard.

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Yet, at the same time and surely completely unknown to us, those same friends look at us and have similar longings. Maybe they wish to have our patience, our ability to deal with burdens, our ability to love, even our ability to run. Whatever it is, it seems to be a human condition: everybody thinks everybody else has things together better than us.

And at the same time, we judge ourselves to be inadequate, inferior, incapable and undeserving.

Moses thought that way too.

So I'm reading in Exodus chapter 3, and it's surprising how quickly this chapter moves. They pretty much made a 2 hour movie out of a few verses in this chapter. Pretty good movie too - by the way.

Here's some back story. The Lord brings Moses out of Egypt, sets him up with a wife, then tells him "Hey, you're going to bring all of the Israelites out of Egypt". Moses knows that the Israelites are like - more than you can count. He knows that the Egyptians rely on that labor to keep their economy going. He knows there's not enough money in the world to buy their freedom, and he's not exactly in good graces with the Egyptians - the first thing they'll want to do when they see him is to kill him. This is not a great setup. It sounds like something akin to "charge of the light brigade", only to Moses it had to sound like "Moses walks into a herd of zombies". He had to know that by himself, he could only hope for being killed less brutally.

The thing is - Moses wasn't by himself. And neither are we. How often do we get a church calling. I suppose it doesn't matter the calling. Maybe it's the nursery leader, maybe it's teaching the 7 year olds, or teenagers. Maybe it's teaching the adults in school, or maybe it's bishop. No madda. Are we up to it? Are we ready?

Of course not. We're not capable of doing any calling well on our own. If we look to our own skill set, we'll fail. And I do believe that it is those who rely on their own skill sets in any calling that are most dangerous. But when we rely on the Lord, things change. Suddenly you take a man with a bounty on his head, who doesn't speak well, a fugitive, and he becomes a prophet. Was he ready? By human standards, of course he wasn't. That didn't matter to the Lord - the Lord made up the difference.

But why? How did our Father know that he could choose Moses? The answer might be in verse 4. "And when the Lord saw that he turned aside to see, God called unto him out of the mist of the bush, and he said, Moses, Moses. And he said, Here am I."

There could be a discussion about what turning aside to see means, but that's out of the scope of this thought, and I don't think I go deep enough to lead that discussion. I do think the key point here though is the last sentence "And he said, Here am I."

I think that's all the Lord needs when he calls us to any position, title or level of authority. He knows what we can do, he knows where we can go with his help. All he needs is willingness from us. "Here am I."

The Lord needs us to be a million dollar bill for him. We're ten cents at the moment. Is that enough? It is under two conditions: 1) we trust the Lord, and 2) we're willing to be used.

"Here am I" is a beautiful phrase. It can apply when you're driving past someone with a flat tire. It can apply when a customer or client needs to be served well. It can apply when life tries to overwhelm us. It can apply when life tries to overwhelm others around us.

May we all surrender our wills to the Lord. I believes it begins with a daily affirmation of "Here am I" to the Lord. And then - he may just return the favor.

#LDS
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#hereamI

light is an interesting subject

So I'm going through an interesting subject - one that I am beginning to understand that I can't begin to understand. The subject is light.

I realized today that light is a way that God refers to himself, and to use a rather vulgar example, somehow it's the best description of his "brand" or his product - or the best description of what it feels like when you're around the Lord.  How it feels when you're living the life the Lord would prescribe.

It makes me recoil a bit to describe the Lord using the word "brand", but if a brand is what you're known by, then that's why I chose that word. It seems to be the word that God uses most to describe himself.

credit: br.depositphotos.com

So the word is light. Jesus used it to describe himself: "I am the light and the life of the world". So if I were really, super duper wise, I'd understand the difference between the two words light and life. Is he referring to something like energy and matter? I don't know and couldn't presume to guess. What I do understand is that I don't even have a kindergarten understanding on the subject, but that I can perhaps get closer if I ask for and receive that gift. What I do understand though, is that Christ referred to himself as two things on this occasion: light and life. That he chose to refer to himself with these two words makes them both pretty good subjects to consider, to study, and to request further understanding about.

So that goes me to today's reading. Alma 36:20. The back story is that Alma had been visited by an angel and corrected from his evil ways, persecuting those who were trying to live well. His pain for doing so left him in a lump on the ground for days. In his words, nothing could be so exquisite and so bitter. He used the language to describe an indescribably painful moment, and with that tool, used the strongest words he could. It was a biblically bad day. 3 of them.

And then he used the same words to describe his joy after he felt the light of forgiveness. "And oh, what joy, and what marvelous light I did behold, yea, my soul was filled with joy as exceeding as was my pain!"

Interesting, isn't it, that Alma could use any of the language's million words (I don't know how many there are) to describe his feelings about the event, and he used the word "light"? What is it about that word? Is it that light is an as-of-yet not understood sector of physics? A physics professor will tell you everything is either matter or waves, but that light is neither-and both. It doesn't fit in either category. How does this fit in with the "light and truth?" I have no answers.

Alma 37:23, and the word is used again "...a stone, which shall shine forth in darkness unto light...". Here again the Lord refers to darkness as the adversary, and all things evil, wrong, angry and sad. And light when things are right.

It is said that people shine when their lives are well lived - that you can see it in their faces. Decide for yourself if that's true, but I often perceive that some people feel lighter, or brighter to me, and it's easy to be around them. Some lift me because I feel who they are, and I yearn to be around them and feel their light.

I don't understand light at all. What I do understand is that any light I have, I don't have. Like a lighthouse, it's not my light. It gets generated somewhere that's not me. The power doesn't belong to me, I just direct it. But I can direct it, and use it, and help others by directing and reflecting whatever it is. I don't have to understand it to use it as I help others navigate their own paths.

May we all seek for that light. May all of our windows be brightly lit by the Lord, and may we brighten our own residences by directing that light toward those around us.

Whose light is that anyway?

So I'm coming at this post from an uncomfortable place today. I don't have the direction of the post figured out yet. I'm trusting that the Lord can make something that I haven't found the pattern to yet.

I've been working on the concept of lighthouses. I know I am to be a lighthouse, and I'm working on learning everything that it means to do so. There is a lot of symbolism, and I feel I can learn more about my role as I learn from the symbolism. For example, what does it mean in the hymn when it says "let the lower lights be burning" - it's a beautiful tune. One that has been in my mind for about a week now when my brain goes to neutral.

For those of us that are male, you'll understand. We like to have our minds in neutral - it's our zero place. It's a good place. For me, that song fills that spot in that place.

Photo by Getty images

And what about the light? The lighthouse doesn't generate it, it just reflects and perhaps directs the light. It's not the lighthouse's light, it's the Lord's, but the lighthouse directs it to save and protect and guide others.

I guess it's also true that the lighthouse may never know or meet those whom it has guided or protected, but it has done its job nonetheless. The lighthouse doesn't come with a lot of fanfare - no marching bands, no fireworks, no applause. It just does its silent job in saving souls.

Today's reading is on light, and I'm working in Alma chapter 32. This follows a well-known discussion on faith. Light comes in slightly after that. verse 35: O then, is not this real? I say unto you, yea, because it is light, and whatsoever is light, is good, ye must know that it is good; and now behold, after ye have tasted this light is your knowledge perfect?

So the answer to the last part of this is that no - you have received light on a subject, and you have knowledge. But that doesn't make you a PhD. It might make you a day 1 kindergarten graduate, but there is lots of room for growth here. It might be true that as soon as you think you've achieved something for yourself or in the Lord's kingdom, you've stopped or severely stinted your future growth.

But when we receive light, "Is this not real?" We know it is when we receive it. It feels, it tastes, and you can see it. You know it. This is how a person can know the difference between good and evil - you come to know the beautiful feel of the Lord's light. Nothing else can approach it.

Many will try to duplicate the light. They will copy the routines, match the language patterns, sing similar songs, use impressive language and shout about holiness, but they lack the Lord's light. Christ is the light and the center of it. Without him, a lighthouse is just a pile of rocks, and its purpose is just as empty.

May we fill ourselves with the Lord's light, and ask him to allow us to reflect that light to others. "As I have loved you, love one another". May we learn what Christ meant when he said "As I have loved you" - that comes first. Then we can lighthouse in His name and with His power.

Fruitful in the land of my affliction

An upcoming sunday school lesson is called "fruitful in the land of my affliction" - it's the story of Joseph, and his rise to power in Egypt. For me, it's a lesson in a few subjects: greatness and forgiveness.

It seems to me that most of us consider our titles to indicate our worth. Men are well known for doing this, but perhaps it just varies in the way it's expressed. For example, if a man can say "I'm the CEO of whateverinc.com", then people immediately give him reference and respect. Men all acknowledge that we define ourselves by our job. This of course is false, because we should be defining ourselves by who we are; not our job, our title, our power, our wealth, our race, political agenda, passions, or any other less meaningful measure.

For me, when introduced the temptation may be to say "I'm an engineer and a home inspector. I'm an entrepreneur, and love to play ultimate frisbee". While that will be an acceptable way to introduce myself to others, I believe that it shouldn't define me to myself. Instead, my own definition of me should be something more like "I'm a follower of Jesus Christ. I try daily to serve Him, to identify and develop any gifts he may have given me, and to serve Him by loving my wife, my children, my grandchildren and others who the Lord may place in my path today"

I go back to a huge award that Julie received from Doterra last year. In front of tens of thousands of people at a live event, and many more who were watching online, she received Doterra's highest award for service. This is her greatness. On that day, she was a rock star. People wanted her autograph. Lines formed to take pictures with her. She remains well remembered and respected now, but is she a greater person now than before the award? Perhaps, but it has nothing to do with having received the award. The award didn't create greatness - it acknowledged it. And if she had not received the award she would still be as great in the Lord's eyes - but perhaps not among her peers.

So the question for me is: is greatness defined by peer decision, or is it defined by the Lord? Who are we looking for confirmation from?

This goes me to Joseph. This was a great man not because he was the number two man to the Pharaoh. He was great because he was great. He was great when he was captured and sold to the egyptians. He was great when he was in the slave line being transported to egypt. He was great when he was Potiphar's house. He was great when he was in jail again. He remained great when the people whose dreams he interpreted forgot about him. He was a great man regardless of his title on any given day. Sometimes that title was slave, sometimes it was inmate, and for some time it was Pharaoh's "father" (Gen 45:8). In all cases, Joseph knew who he was, and it had nothing to do with his living conditions.

Joseph tearfully pleaded not to be sold by his brothers. This would be doubly traumatic to anyone - first that you're being ripped away from your family and sold as a slave, and second that your family would do that to you. This alone would normally finish any of us. It didn't dampen Joseph's greatness.

Joseph, through correct living and good choices, gained Potiphar's respect - and the appreciation of Potiphar's wife. He chose to follow the Lord, and had to reject her advances. And what did it net him? Who would say the Lord took care of you, when following the Lord took you away from a good life and landed you in the dungeon? For most of us, that would feel like the Lord abandoned us and cause most of us to become bitter. It didn't dampen Joseph's greatness.

Then there's the dream thing. Joseph correctly interpreted the dreams of the butcher and baker. He didn't take any credit for the interpretation - he deferred that greatness to the Lord. But what did it net him? Nothing at all - for two more years. Two more years of rotting in the dungeon. 700+ more mornings and sunsets in the same rotting sewer. If the Lord's going to let you rot there despite your best efforts, why bother? Right? Even this didn't dampen Joseph's greatness.

Joseph felt deeply the pain from being abandoned by his brothers. It's not like this was easy and he just bumped along, accepting whatever. He felt the pain deeply, but chose to follow and serve the Lord regardless. This - and not his title - is why he owned his own greatness.

Joseph's deception to his brothers wasn't a game of anger and gotcha. He had to cry (Genesis 43:30) when it became too much for him - the feelings were still very raw. But he chose to believe it was all for a higher purpose and had faith in his God - regardless of his conditions.

Inner greatness is real. Outer greatness is only a perception. May we seek inner greatness in ourselves, and in those we surround ourselves with. Finally, may we find inner greatness by serving and forgiving all. We can leave judgement and vengeance to the great judge of all. It's a better way to live happily.

Fathers

It seems that the word of the week for me lately is Father. First, I found a song by Michael Mclean that I'm working with. It turns out I might have a singing voice. I discovered Mclean's song "I am not his father" - a beautiful and touching song - and it turns out I can sing it. It's a gorgeous song about our Father. I've been mulling how I can use the concepts this song brings out when I speak at my own father's funeral. He's 91 and definitely looking forward to his own passing, and I will celebrate with him when our Father finally calls him home.

And this morning I bump along in Moses Chapter 7, and the verse that stands out to me is 37.  "But behold, their sins shall be upon the heads of their fathers; Satan shall be their father, and misery shall be their doom; and the whole heavens shall weep over them, even all the workmanship of mine hands; wherefore should not the heavens weep, seeing these shall suffer?"

I think this verse applies to those who willfully chose against the truths they knew, and chose to defy the Lord and their own happiness in favor of what there short-term, willful wants were. These individuals not only curse themselves forever, but their children and grandchildren. It happened in the beginning of time, and it happens now. People that get mad because someone was mean to their child, because someone stole the cream, or because a leader proved his imperfectness in public. Maybe it's because someone misused a paragraph. I guess it doesn't matter what the "reason" is - what matters is that we let our own selfishness, spurred by anger, to get in the way of our path toward happiness and eternity.

So, a person drops away from the iron rod - the word of God. He begins to follow what he considers to be his own path - or the path that Satan places him on. He loses his center, his happiness, his direction and his future. Then, his children follow suit.

While it is true that we are all responsible for our own decisions, it's also true that we only get judged for how we play the cards we're dealt. For example, a child in Mozambique, who will never see missionaries or even a member of the lord's church will not be held responsible for not being baptized, obeying all of the commandments, or not receiving temple blessings. They were not available to him. He'll be held responsible for the truths his parents gave him. And on the same note, the parents will be held responsible for the truths they know. Their responsibility is to live them, to expand on them, and to pass them on to their children.

So I believe that when the parents cause a whole community - generations after generations - of their family to flounder, it is the parents who will some day be held responsible. This goes me back to the verse above "But behold, their sins shall be upon the heads of their fathers".

Can you imagine how much dark poison will be heaped upon Cane for what he caused his progeny to suffer? And how much different is it for us as we choose improperly?

I guess the saving grace is Grace. Christ has paid the price. Cane's progeny suffered in life because of Cane's choices - but that's on Cane. If their hearts are pure, as judged by the only perfect judge, they can be saved.

I remember my parents telling me that. My mom especially because I interacted with her the most. She told me that it was her job to teach me, so that she wouldn't be held responsible for holding me back from happiness. She did teach me. My father as well. While certainly not perfect, they did as well as they could do - they played the cards they were dealt as well as they could. I'm grateful for them and I honor them.

If the word of the week is Fathers, I'm hopeful for my dad that his time has come. In any case, may we look at our roles and evaluate if we are ready to stand before the great Judge, and report on our role as fathers and leaders. And may our Father judge us with love.

Wresting and Wrestling

Somedays are like that. Yesterday I comfortably read for a while. This time, I couldn't finish the first paragraph before I felt compelled to stop reading and find my keyboard. I guess the rest of the inspiration will have to happen in front of the screen. 

I'm in Alma Chapter 41 today. Verse 1. "...for behold, some have wrested the scriptures, and have gone far astray because of this thing..."

This goes me down a path that is familiar to me. Those who have decided that they are wise, attempting to put themselves in a place of superiority and "leadership" that is best described to me as "aboveness". 

Yes, I make words up a lot.

 We've all heard the argument: "I've studied fill-in-the-blank-this and fill-in-the-blank-that, so I'm an expert. Now let me inform you of what I know and expect you to accept based on my expert and super-informed analysis. I am so much smarter than you"

OK, those words don't exactly get used in that order, but we've all heard a variety of them being used. It's not a church thing, it's a human being thing. 

But in this case, Alma and the Lord are talking about people who "wrest" with the scriptures. My first inclination is to replace the word "wrest" with the word "wrestle" because I didn't know what wrest means. To me, to wrestle means to do battle with, to fight, to twist as needed until we win. To pin others using our learned techniques, and then claim that God is on our team because we slammed the opponent to the mat. 

Google had a different perspective on the word. It says that the archaic (1830's) meaning is to "distort the meaning or interpretation of (something) to suit one's own interests or views." This sounds like what I described above. To use the scriptures not as a tool for learning, but as a weapon for winning. 

Now let me step out on thin ice for a bit. It seems to me that a person who is truly wanting to be guided and led toward truth will find all sources available. He or she would consult with any wise or spiritual people they find around them. They would refer to the prophets who live today. They would study the subject in all books available, perhaps both the scriptures as well as books written by wise people whose opinion can be trusted. Finally and most importantly, they would consult with the Lord. This is done by asking sincerely and not only listening to the Lord's answer but being prepared to humbly act on the instructions. Moroni 10:3-5 applies here.

Here's the thin ice: if a person resorts to a single scripture or scripture set that supports his pre-determined opinion, and excludes other sources of truth because they don't support his opinion, he is wresting. As the Lord says in Alma, these people go far astray. These people and their opinions should be addressed from a distance. They can be loved as sons and daughters of God, but their forcefulness must be avoided or resisted as the case may require. 

And do you want more thin ice? What about bible basher A who says "well, how about this scripture?" and then bible basher B says "well, check this one out!" and neither really considers either scripture, nor refers to the higher sources that are always available to them. These people may not be truth seekers - they might just be people who like to prove their own intellect and superiority. Their self-assumed "leadership" should be treated with suspicion. If your leader wants you to do whatever because he has a favorite scripture, and on that alone, you might want to consider finding a new leader. 

Find a church leader who encourages personal prayer, study, relying on the spirit, on prophets and apostles. On not just the bible but the Book of Mormon and other scriptures. On gifts and personal revelation. On local leaders who are more interested in guiding you to happiness than on what you contribute to their wallet. When your leader focuses on you more, and what you can do to worship them less, you have a true servant leader. LDS bishops make no nickels off the donations of who they serve - it makes them better leaders in my opinion. 

May we avoid being self deluded. May we avoid pride in any of our perceived gifts. If we have gifts, they are gifts from Another - not something we earned or own. May we seek truth, not battle for the win. May we seek depth, not just knowledge. May we learn God's love, not just memorize his words for use later on. May we wrest the pride out of our hearts, not argue forcefully to reinforce its presence.

Life is happier that way. I like happier. 

Bondage and real freedom

I remember a friend of mine once saying something like this: "For a person who puts so many rules and restrictions on yourself, you seem to be a very happy person". She was referring to my LDS faith and lifestyle. After all, in her view, how could anyone be happy when you can't drink any alcohol?

I could get into the difference between "can't" and "choose not to", but that's not the direction I want to go today.

Today's reading for me is in the Book of Mormon. Mosiah, chapters 22-24. It was good for me to just sit down and read. The book of Mormon always entertains and soothes me. The story that I picked up immediately as I started reading is this: how does a person or group of people escape bondage?

The back story super briefly goes like this: A well intentioned group of people heads to the lands of the bad guys to try to build relations and cause peace. They do OK at first, because this people was good at heart. But then the good guys become bad guys over a generation or two, and things get ugly. Enslavement. Bondage. Burdens. Powerlessness. Risk of extermination. You get the idea. Then a few of them remember their God and escape the bad guy camp. They start a good guy camp.

Things are going swimmingly, then an army of the first set of bad guys shows up and is led by a member of the second set of bad guys. All members of the bad guys have one goal: make the good guys pay. What follows is more ugly. That's the surface story.

But after reading, for me the story is about personal enslavement. Being the owner of your own soul; your own spirit and body. The first batch of good guys used a large dose of alcohol to get their guards drunk and sleeping, then they exited stage left, and began a journey back to safety.

So the irony for me here is this: who in these groups was really in bondage? The good guys that were slaves, or the bad guys who had a personal vice? And isn't it interesting that the Lord used the personal bondage of the bad guys to free his people?

It makes me question what the meaning of bondage really is.

Then we underscore the point. In the next chapters, a new group of good and bad guys happen. The army that was looking for group 1 above finds good guy group 2. They enslave them. Abuse and mistreatment.

If I were in that group, there is a chance I could choose to be bitter. I did whatever I did before I had a choice to be better, then I chose the good guys. I left my home and followed good. So here we are, and now life is worse than ever for me. Why doesn't God take care of his people? All my efforts to do well just caused me to have a life that is worse than ever. Is God really there? Why did he allow this? Why should I keep trying?

But once again, this story is only about mistreatment on the surface. Being in physical bondage was their physical condition, but not the condition of their souls. As the story goes, physical loads were heaped on their backs, and the Lord didn't lighten them or take them away, or even free them for a time. Instead, He made those burdens easier to bear. He needed to teach His people that bondage is about what's inside your body, not what's on it.

And I believe it is the same with us. When we can free ourselves from inner bondage, then we are free. Freedom from such things as alcohol come to mind for most of us, but there is much more we can free ourselves from. Pornography, anger, language, dishonesty, backbiting, selfishness - the list could go on forever.

And the more things I can put behind me to whatever degree, the more free I am.

This goes me back to the point of my friend. Freedom and happiness isn't found in doing everything - that's a pathway to enslavements. Freedom is choosing the Lord, finding your greatness, and making the most of who you can become. The Lord provides that sunshine when we hand him a clean inner soul - one that we now own and have title to: one we can give to him because it's now ours to give.

It's a brighter day than we have seen before. On occasion I get glimpses of that brighter day - and I can testify that it's worth seeking. May we seek it with every corner of our being.

When the Lord waxes poetic

Having just returned from a doterra event in the Dominican republic, my eyes have been opened just a bit more. While here in Utah I am surrounded by great people who are LDS, I found there great people as well - most of whom are not LDS. What they know about the church is very limited, and simply knowing Julie and me probably doubles what they believe they know about the church.

These are beautiful, amazing, powerful people to be certain. Some of their leaders would have them believe that Joseph Smith, our first prophet in modern days, was nothing more than a huckster. A fraud.

But what I see in Joseph's writings leaves me floored. What a powerful writer! A man who, if he wrote these things himself, did so with 3rd grade education. I compare this to myself. I have a master's degree, and have written almost daily for 25 years. At first it was home inspection reports, then a number of articles for KSL.com. I've written five books, and now, this blog. I have also further polished my language skills with hundreds of podcasts and more hundreds of videos. Yet for all the skills I've developed, I couldn't come close to writing with the power that I read today. Either this huckster was super insanely good, or he was writing under the direction of the greatest author. I think it's the latter. I testify that it is.

Whether the government is that of the United States, China, or others, there are those who are good men who wish only to serve and lift the people they govern. But the question is always: how far does the government go to do this? Can you mandate success or happiness? While I was in China, I quickly came to understand that they were doing the best they could - I just believe they started with some false assumptions about what governing means.

While reading the Lord's take on the subject, the first verse that struck me was D&C 134:4. First off, the Lord is treading an extremely fine line in defining what is the role of government vs the rights of the individual. To misuse any word on such a subject could cause extreme harm, resulting in either oppression and lives lost, or anarchy, and lives lost. To say that this subject is a mine field is an understatement of global proportion. I'll leave most of that reading to whoever wants to look it up for themselves.

But the end of the verse I found to be powerful and poetic - and precise. All those things, done in the same sentences. "...that the civil magistrate should restrain crime, but never control conscience; should punish guilt, but never suppress the freedom of the soul".

How the clarity and vision of such a statement lifts my soul! Here is the Lord poetically delineating a subject that has been argued in every country, every year, in every college. Here he uses concise words that could not be found so clearly in any of the greatest of schools of learning.

The chapter goes on to explain clearly some other things, like what an organization can do when one of its members errs. Again, the concise clarity, and the correctness of thought, jumps out of the page at me. I hear the Lord's voice speaking directly to me as I read these verses. Men may argue and debate, they may opine and exercise their grey matter. They may illustrate their ability to speak, to think, and to outwit, but in the end, the most gifted of these men cannot hold a candle to the Lord's voice.

And in the end, hopefully we choose to follow the Lord's voice - even when it may differ with the final thoughts of those who claim to be the smartest, most intelligent, or most wise. May we choose the Lord - even when it's unpopular.