We are not of your faith

So I'm reading Alma 43 today. I've gotta say this is a lot more fun than reading the Book of Mormon used to be when I was a teenager. Then, I did it because my Seminary teacher required it as homework. As a missionary, I did it knowing that I should. Doing those things helped me, but this time it's purely voluntary, and I'm doing it with a goal - searching for hidden treasure - and it becomes dessert to me. Reading scripture this way has never happened before in my life, and I'm gaining something very new to me.

So these are the war chapters. As a teenager I found them more interesting because they got away from the spiritual a bit and were more of a novel. That's what I thought. But the reality I see now is different - hidden in the words of these war stories are the usual set of buried treasure. As always, one must be searching for them before they pop up.

So the story is this: hordes of lamanites attack the Nephites. The nephites are vastly outnumbered, and by any general's calculations, should be easily defeated. But the Nephites, as these scriptures point out, are fighting for the lands, their liberty and their families. They are the good guys, and the Lord is on their side. The hordes? They just hate the good guys, and they're lead as always by people who were former good guys, who are now hating and hateful. But we've been down that road in previous posts.

So. The Lord and some good generals prepare the Nephites for war. Breast plates, arm protectors, helmets, etc. Inner and outer strength. Preparation. Intelligence. War wisdom. All of these things are gifts they received from God, and realities they created based on their faith in Him. They were open to guidance, they received it, they welcomed it and were grateful for it, and most importantly they acted on it. These are of course not just recipes for war success, but for life success.

And in verse 43, the battle is won. Bad guys surrounded. Bad guys in a river, both banks taken by the Nephites. Moroni, the Nephite general calls for peace in the name of the God who gave victory to the Nephites. Good guys give the victory to their ultimate general - the Ultimate general. Bad guys simply see a battle lost.

And when peace is sued for by the good guys in the name of their god, bad guys say "43 ...We are not of your faith, we do not believe that it is God that has delivered us into your hands; but we believe that it is your cussing that has preserved your from our swords. Behold, it is your breastplates and your shields that have preserved you".

In a roundabout way, that may be partly true. Their shields and plates did make a huge difference. But those were there because they listened to the guidance they received from the Lord. That's the difference - and in this case that may be how the Lord saved his people. He did it with greater intelligence.

It reminds me of the story about the drowning man who pleads with the Lord for a rescue. To make the story short, a boat and a helicopter come by and offer to save him. He denies the request, saying the Lord will save him. The man drowns and gets to the other side. He yells at the Lord for not saving him, and the Lord replies "Hey, I sent you a boat and a helicopter - what did you want?"

It reminds me also of a guy in the LA airport shuttle. He was late for his plane and freaking out. Everyone on the shuttle knew very clearly what his worries and concerns were, when his plane left, and when he had to be to the gate. Finally he said "well, I guess if God wants me to be late, then I guess I'll be late".

I thought about that for one second and decided that God likely didn't make him sleep in. God didn't make him decide to not allow for slow traffic. So it's a two-way street. We need to do what we can do, and be open to guidance from the Lord. The Lord didn't make breastplates in heaven and dump them on the Nephites in a rain storm, but he did tell them that they needed them, and how to make them.

May we spend more time making and using breast plates and shields, and less time sleeping in, and then relying on God to get us there on time. The life that he wants us to have is right there to take, but we must reach out and accept it.

I don't have that answer

Reading in Alma today - it's about the Lamanites going to war against the Nephites (the good guys because they follow the Lord and are not the aggressors). About how the former Nephites - people who knew or had access to the truth, go to what we will call the dark side. Not only do they simply join the dark side, but they get so much darker. The story relates how it is these ex-good guys become the military leaders of the Lamanites. Descendants of people who once had the priesthood and the truth, but found it inconvenient to their lifestyle and choices.

It's not that much different today. People who leave the church are so often fully owned by Satan's hand that simply leaving the church isn't enough. Satan has his suckers in deep enough to ruin the man - why not go the next step and have the ruined man ruin everyone else they can?

It seems like it's kinda like a bag of potatoes. One potato going bad not only smells real bad, but destroys all other potatoes that they touch. And they can do it so quickly.

A spiritual core of love, strength, kindness and faith can become a core of tar, poison, stench and hatred.

It's a human travesty. But here's my thing today: what if the bad potato is someone you love? What if some of his or her issues are not completely their fault? What if I caused, or was the root of some of those poisons?

If it's a potato, you can hold your nose and throw it out, then clean up the remaining mess. You can't do that with someone you love. You can ache for them, for the pain they feel, for the hard life they have chosen. You can reach out, and plead to the Lord. You can feel for their pain - but you can't reach in and take over. You can't make their decisions for them. This has to be how the Lord feels about us. It might give each of us as parents some idea of the pain the Lord feels for us - and perhaps the joy too.

As parents, and as a human being, I can't allow the bad decisions of others to shut me down. Others have their issues, and they will pay whatever price the Lord decides for their decisions. I will pay my own, and we will all agree with the Lord that his decisions are just. But there is a balance - to feel for the pain of someone you love who is failing in some way, vs having it shut my life down too. The Lord will fight my battles, and I can't take ownership of any issues but my own, as doing so indicates either a lack of understanding, or of faith. Those issues don't belong to me, and to wrest them away from the Lord is not my place. It even goes so far as to say "I don't trust you, Father, to take this issue. I'll take it".

And when we do, we can't handle it. We never could.

I choose faith - my wayward children and I - we're all wayward in some way - will have our day with the Lord. He knows how weedy our field was when we started, and how weedy it was when we finished. Only he knows that. He has already paid the price - he has the weed killer. All we can do is choose faith, and make our fields as flowerful as possible in the meantime.

Common knowledge is wrong again

As a born contrarian, I love it when I open up the curtain and find that what everybody considers to be true - well, it just isn't. I've had some pretty contrarian positions that I've published about radon and meth, for example. I've done battle with supervisors, got myself fired, and ended up working for myself. That happens I guess.

And now we run into a fairly big one. The "don't judge others" phrase you so often hear when someone doesn't want you dipping into their subject? Yeah - it's not that clean. The Lord knows - and the world knows - that making judgments is a regular part of our every day lives. We judge who we're going to do business with, who we hang out with, who we marry, and what time we tell our kids to come home. We judge how fast to drive the car, and yes, we judge how fast others are driving theirs.

Moroni 7 makes it a bit more clear. "15...it is given unto you to judge, that ye may know good from evil; and the way to judge is plain" "16...the Spirit of Christ is given to every man; that he may know good from evil".

In the defense of the "don't judge - ever" crowd, I think what they're going for is what Moroni mentions in verse 18. "...See that ye do not judge wrongfully; for with that same judgment which ye judge ye shall also be judged."

That sounds painful. So here's the scenario: a teenager listening to his phone on a skateboard falls because he hit a sidewalk bump. I could respond "the dude's an idiot - maybe he learned something" or I could see him as his parents and God see him - as a part of all of us who do things that hurt, and need help.

Some of my friends are working through issues with having been molested as children - one by her father, one by her grandfather. This is something on a scale that I have never experienced before. What I do understand is this: one of them has placed that event as an event in her life that she now accepts simply as having happened. It has not affected how she feels about herself, and does not limit her success as an adult. How she does this I couldn't begin to speak about. Another friend is dealing with that as well. She's not as far along the journey as the first, but I have no doubt that in the end she will defeat this set of demons like she has others.

I bring this up because it's about forgiveness. This is a subject that I struggle with as well - people that I thought cared about me do what I consider to be traitorous, and I have had issues with that. What I realize is that they don't see it that way - and how they did see it doesn't matter because I only control my own thoughts. I only am responsible for me and what I do, and who I become.  Others will err, as do I, and frankly, I've realized that if I can give others a pass for what I consider to be huge errors, I'll get the same kind of forgiveness when judgment day comes for me.

It's like cheating the system - but it was designed that way. If I can forgive others in a way greater than anyone could expect, I'll get that kind of forgiveness for me. Better on judgment day, and probably a much better way to live. Grudges tend to weigh a lot. One is a big load - more than that can crush you.

A thought came to me once as someone I know was complaining loudly about someone she worked with. I said "is it ok with you that others are imperfect?" I got a quizzical look from her. It didn't end well. I realize now that while I was trying to straighten her out, I had failed to realize that I was perhaps judging harshly. If I had realized that I needed to be OK with her being imperfect at that moment, things might have gone better. The irony.

May we judge, as we must always do, but with kindness, with love. With forgiveness, understanding that we don't know that person like God does. And knowing that if we don't have the whole picture, we can't judge completely.

Real intent

Gotta love Moroni - he knows a thing or two about being real. This is a man that spends all of his life in a war zone, and most of his life fearing for his life as the last known man who is on the side that lost.

He probably knew something about real vs. fake people because if his side were real in relying on Christ, he probably wouldn't have been the last man standing. Christ would have found a way to save that people, but in other verses he was clear that the so called good guys were as evil as the bad guys. I believe it's much worse to be a good guy gone bad than a bad guy that never knew good. A gift given, but rejected, can only be a curse to the rejector. That's what I suspect.

So Moroni includes some of what his dad, Mormon, had written. He speaks of one of my trigger words: gifts. He says that his calling is a gift in verse 2, and because of that gift, he is permitted to speak.

So - a calling by itself can be a gift from God. We have so many things we can be grateful for, so many gifts. And among those gifts are the callings we receive - or at least they can be gifts.

Then in verse 3, he refers to the rest of the Lord. I have written about this previously - what a gift this is! Julie came to know what a gift this is - it changed her life.

But it's the intent thing that caught my eye today. He refers to real intent at least twice in this chapter, and I know he did so again in chapter 10. Not nice words, not flowery words, not so called impressive words that may be really meant for the other people in the room. Real. Intent.

v 6"..except he shall do it with real intent it profiteth him nothing. 7 For behold, it is not counted unto him for righteousness." and 10 "if he shall pray and not with real intent of heart; yeaa, and it profiteth him nothing, for God receiveth none such."

I go back to my mission in El Salvador and Guatemala. I am reminded of one individual who took about 20-30 seconds to get started. He began by calling on the Father, and listed a number of His traits. At first I thought it was kind of impressive, but soon I realized it was repeated with each prayer. The words weren't meant, they were memorized. Father knows what he has done - and my guess is he didn't need this guy to remind him. I was always uncomfortable with this guy's repetitive monologue, and now I have scriptural reason to back up my discomfort. If you're speaking to appear to have grandeur, then you might just be a poser. Posers don't win any points with men on earth, and even fewer, I suspect, in heaven. The power in the words come from the humility of the speaker, not the length of the phrases.

Harsh words. But hey - I'm a guy. It's not usually in my nature to speak diplomatically. This is a reminder to me that being real comes first. And appearing to be whatever? That's not last - because it's not even on the list.

Trust your journey - and love

So I felt like I had permission to go back to the Book of Mormon today. I haven't always felt like this, but since I started this reading and writing thing I just find the Book of Mormon so much more uplifting. My coach Makay says it comes and goes - I guess I'm too new in the game for that to have happened yet to me.

Moroni will forever have my respect. Great man, born in what the rest of us might conclude to be the wrong time. Greatness surrounded by poison sludge. He has no reason to live that he can decipher, but he doesn't want to die. He waits for God to make that decision for him, but it doesn't happen. He ends what he thinks will be the Book of Mormon as a whole when he ends with Ether, who he quotes as saying "Whether the Lord will that I be translated, or that I suffer the will of the Lord in the flesh, it mattereth not...".

But it has to have been a life filled with boredom, loneliness and fear - improved only by the bouyancy that the Lord may have gifted him. He certainly identified with Ether - he is Ether, just in another century. It's a poetic way to go out.

But he doesn't die. There he is, still there. Ether was saved to be a testament to the Nephites what happened to his people. Moroni was saved I believe because he had to write more. To me, some of the greatest chapters in the book of Mormon happen in this last book, after Moroni thought his life and meaningfulness were over. This might be like the lives of so many of us. Joseph Smith in Carthage jail mourned deeply and to me, poetically about the horrible state of affairs he experienced. And in that pitiful state, he received some of the greatest chapters in the D&C.

Sometimes we think we're doing all the right things and the Lord has just left us - forgotten. And that's the time for faith. He may need us to go through that well, so we can experience and become the greatness he has in mind for us.

Just gotta mention that after a life of killing and having his life threatened by lamanites, he didn't hate them. He felt love. In modern wars that I've been somewhat involved with, the enemy is generally hated. This makes it easier to do one's job and kill them if you're a soldier. It happened in Japan and Germany, in Vietnam and in the middle east. To a soldier, they need to die just to make the world right. Not to a soldier named Moroni. In Moroni 1:4 he said he's writing more not necessarily for our generation, but "that perhaps they may be of worth unto my brethren, the Lamanites".

That's a love and a greatness that I can only attempt to perceive.

I had intended to write about what I saw in chapter 7 - that's another treasure chest. But mixing too many subjects just doesn't feel right.

May we trust in the Lord whether our lives are up or down. If we are truly his disciples, then we are where and how He needs us to be. It may or may not be comfortable, but it will be perfect for us at that moment. We can fight against our conditions, or learn and grow from them. May we choose the latter.

Sometimes it's just good to know

As the title of the web page may indicate, I am fascinated with the gifts that we all receive and can receive from the Father of us all. I'm fascinated with how those are delivered, and with the angels who help us get to where we and the heavens concur that we should go.

I am quite certain that my belief set is correct, because there are scriptures I've found that back it up. One of them is in Moroni - I've referred to that one before. I was reading in Doctrine and Covenants today. I still prefer the Book of Mormon, as the reading is easier, less legal, and I feel that there are more hidden treasures in that book for me. Nonetheless, I was in Doctrine and Covenants 107 today, looking for treasure.

This chapter outlines the priesthood and the organization of the church. It can be interesting to see words and phrases that have been adopted in the church, and when you read that verse, you know it came from there.

Before I get into the main part of my thoughts, I noticed the words "in their own standing". High priests in verse 10 have a right to officiate in their own standing. Verse 11 talks about guys in their own stead. To me that's probably the same thing. If it's different, that little gem is beyond me right now.

One might discuss what that means, but I'm going another direction. Verse 19 talks about how the Melchizedek priesthood may "have the privilege of receiving the mysteries of the kingdom of heaven, to have the heavens opened unto them... and to enjoy the communion and presence of God..."

How sweet that is, to have the heavens open just a little for me. To be guided by someone on the other side who is committed to my success and happiness. To enjoy the communion and presence of God. I'm sure I don't feel that like the prophets do, but I'm grateful for the slice that I get. How sweet it is that I can from time to time feel God's hand, his love, and know the gift that his guidance is. How kind to allow me to occasionally serve others with those gifts I've received, and to see the gifts of others who are also willing to give, and to help people that I love.

This is not about bragging, it's about gratitude. This scripture confirms again that there really is the gift to all that I have found so valuable in my life. I'm not unique in that way, I'm sure the same gifts are available to all. But there's a price we all have to pay, and when we pay that price, it's given to us in a way that matches our capacities.

I'm not unique in that way, but I am unique - as are we all. The Lord knows our gifts and capacities. He won't plant corn on hard rock, but he might be able to build a house on it. May we all be open to growing and being built by the Lord. May we grow willingly as desired by the Lord, and relish the thing that the Lord makes of us. If we do our side well, whatever the Lord creates it will probably be perfect.

Sign me up

Today's reading is to me about signs. I go back to my mission and remember those who I was teaching. These were doubting people who at one point said "show me a sign and I'll believe".

I told them they were wrong. They still wouldn't believe after they were shown a sign, and having received one, they would be further condemned because they were provided a gift from heaven, but rejected it. That sign was a gift provided, yet sent back - returned to sender. It's like the child that gets a birthday gift and gives it back to the giver. Not a good way to motivate someone to give you other gifts.

I remember from my missionary days another elder in the group - he had been in catholic priest training for years and had a passion for book learning of the bible variety. Now more scriptural passion is always better, but only if it doesn't make a person think he can elevate himself and consider himself greater than, or less needy of the spirit to guide him.

This missionary was very good with not only the biblical scriptures, but had taken himself to learning the other LDS books with the same kind of fervor. He was a scriptoral master. I remember him going down the road of signs with one of my people who was ready for baptism. He taught my investigator, through the scriptures about signs, and why they follow faith - not precede. My investigator was extremely impressed and told me all missionaries should have that kind of mastery and approach. Despite that, I don't know if he stayed in the church. He seemed like someone who would rather be fed then feed himself.

The scripture is this: D&C 63:9-11: "..faith cometh not by signs, but signs follow those that believe"

Hold that thought. It's interesting that the Lord doesn't say signs come after faith directly. They follow faith. To me that means that you go out believing - having faith - and live your life. Without the expectation of signs, you're living your life as well as you can, moving forward and relying on the spirit to guide you and Christ to save you. And as you do so? Here's a sign - a bonus for you. And then again - another sign. Not requested, not expected, maybe not even searched for - just there. Not to cause faith, but to confirm.

v10 "Yea, signs come by faith, not by the will of men, nor as they please, but by the will of God. 11 Yea, signs come by faith, unto mighty works, for without faith no man pleaseth God;

I noticed something else in there. "nor as they please" - as who pleases? Men. Signs don't happen because of a man's will nor as he wants one. Men don't command God. Men are not in control. Men don't get to decide when they get a sign. It's not something where you think of something you want, place the order with God, then tap your foot till you receive it. This places God in the role of a McDonald's drive up cook. That's not how it works.

May we have faith and do the best we can. May we see the signs, listen to the guidance we receive, and follow the guidance we get, then be grateful for the gifts and signs we get. May expectations of the Lord fall away from our lives and be replaced with gratitude.

It's a better way to live.

Cheer up

So I am called back to something I read yesterday. It's Doctrine and Covenants 61, verse 36 and 37. The last thing I noticed, just now, is that the Lord doesn't use colloquialisms. I guess that wherever the Lord resides, colloquial words (slang words) just don't get used much - at least ours don't. Instead of "cheer up", He says "be of good cheer". I guess that's clearer and much less likely to have a changing meaning as centuries go by, and as the words get translated to other languages. This to me is another extremely small example of the precision the Lord uses when picking his words. Being a writer on occasion, I can appreciate the ease of writing one thing and having someone interpret them to mean something else.

In any case, verse 37 says "and inasmuch as you have humbled yourselves before me, the blessings of the kingdom are yours." This sounds to me like a beatitude. As in "blessed are the meek for they shall inherit the earth", and the rest of them. To me, the beatitudes are basically different ways to describe desirable traits, and the result is described differently using different words, but they all get to the same place: if you do x, you get eternal life with God.

So here is another one: humble yourselves before God, and you get God's greatest gift. I'm thinking some of us perhaps understand more what it means to humble ourselves before god, vs being meek. It's the same pathway to the same God, but sometimes it feels easier to different folk. Same pathway, different sign perhaps. Don't misinterpret that by the way. God has one path. It's his truth.

And what does humbling yourself look like? It might mean understanding that his gospel and the stuff we're taught in it will be truth, right and proper, even though we don't understand it at the moment. Even though we may never understand it while on this orb. Even though it's unpopular with our friends or government leaders. Even if it's legal but the Lord says it's not OK. Even if it goes against our political belief set. Even if it stings a bit because we have children that are doing something other than what the Lord suggests, and we still love those children.

It means that we don't choose one style of preaching because it's more fun to listen to than the truth - or more accepting of our own vices which we are unwilling to yield to the Lord. It means that we don't blame the Lord for our choices, or the results of our choices. It means that when we distance ourselves from the Lord, we don't blame him for being far away from us.

It means humbling ourselves, and accepting His will. Things get so much easier that way.

It's only bad news if...

One of the subjects I've really been fascinated about lately is that conditions don't necessarily dictate how we have to feel about our circumstances. One person has something happen to him and he's despondent or broken. Another has the same kind of thing happen and he uses it to rise to further greatness. Whether it's a car accident, or a family member dying, the idea that keeps circulating in my mind is that the event doesn't dictate where your life goes - you do.

This is still a new concept to me and my brain pathways are still working on accepting it completely, but I feel like I've discovered something. 

I've discussed this earlier, but for example Julie was reaching for Blue Diamond - a big deal in Doterra because it's a rank that far less than 1 percent of individuals achieve. In the midst of all that she had someone go postal on her, causing lots of drama, time loss, and all around hatred and poison. Julie could have swam in the poison, but I was super proud of her for choosing love. This person gave Julie quite a gift, as Julie was once again able to see the tremendous outpouring of love and gratitude that others feel for her. People passionately defended her who Julie doesn't even know. And the ones she does know? That was a living tribute. She has achieved so much greatness and the people around her see it. The greatness is not about your rank or title - it's about who you are.  

So in Helaman, the story relates about how the Lamanites, led by people who once knew the truth and dissented from it (that's a lesson in itself) took battle to the Nephites. This always seems to happen when the center of the "good guys" isn't always so good. The book of Mormon tries extremely hard to make that clear. So after the government leaders are killed to make room for bad guys, the Lamanites take the opportunity to attack while the Nephites have their eyes off the ball. 

They go to the center. Their Washington DC is called Zarahemla. It's in the middle of the land, and the Lamanites overwhelm it. From my non military point of view, that's pretty much time to despair. The opposing army is big enough to take out any other city and they control the center of your country. Communications and leadership is gone, and all the infrastructure that would support a military campaign has a big hole in the center. Psychologically one might choose to give up.

But the nephite captains and military leaders didn't see it that way. They chose to believe that it was a tactical advantage. The Lamanites were headed north to take that land, which would have sandwiched the Nephites and led to their demise. Everyone knew that. So rather than curse God and give up, or rather than feel bad for themselves and fall on their sword, or whatever faithless option they might have chosen, they instead placed an army to the north, and another to the south. Much blood spilled. The Nephites won. 

Peace was restored again. And why? From my point of view, the Nephites were evil enough to need/deserve/invite evil into their civilization, and that exposed them to what I'll call the fiery darts of the enemy. In this case, those fiery darts were men with swords, but for us, those fiery darts are usually something else. 

Yet while they invited the chastening, they yet remained good enough for the Lord to prevent them from fully being destroyed. Perhaps in the time between being attacked and repulsing the opposing army, many of them got humble and remembered what they already should have known - goodness wins over evil. Evil vs evil can be a roll of the dice. Protection from evil isn't just about making better swords, it's about making yourself better inside. Then God can help you. 

Yeah, the same thing applies today.

Finally as relates to Coriantumr, the Lamanite general. He was a nephite dissenter. He'd been with the good guys and should have known what righteousness was. He should have known about greatness, about faith, and about the Lord. In the Book of Mormon the leaders of the bad guys always seem to have been former good guys. They know goodness and then choose poison. The poison they ingest then makes them more poisonous people than others who never knew the truth could ever become. That poison can be overcome, as shown by early church dissenters in the 1800's who came back, but the damage they do is frightening. Despite that, when they can humble themselves, the Lord still loves them and welcomes them back. 

Yet many get too stuck in their own grimy swamp. When they find themselves surrounded by this slimy darkness, somehow rather than humble themselves and choose the light, they rage against their conditions and choose more darkness. The pain this causes can certainly hurt their Father to the center of His being.

But there is always hope. A father never stops loving his children.

What happens to you doesn't change who you are

As I begin this thought, I'm first reminded to start with a phrase my daughter once said while a teenager. She has a kind heart and has befriended some individuals that I have always considered to be poisonous people. On the one hand, I get that it's good to lift others. On the other hand, you become the five people that you hang around the most. One must be vigilant to lift others, rather than be dragged into others' cesspools.

In any case to describe the story, I was talking to her about how I didn't think these friends were the greatest. With the attitude that teenagers all have down to a fine art, she grumpily said "my friends don't change what I do". She believed it with all the fervor that a teenager can muster. The next day she was arrested with her friends for shoplifting.

I go back to a little mission that began for me when I was talking to a friend who told me about the greek stoics. He said they believed that what happens to you is neither good nor bad, it just is. What is good or bad is how you respond to it. It's a concept very much worth thinking about.

Since that time, I've seen where I believe that is wisdom. An event that makes one person bitter, makes another better. One chooses anger, another chooses strength and peace. My lovely wife just experienced that. She was reaching for a very high rank in her business - something that about one percent of one percent reach. Yeah - it's a pretty big deal. As a result of that huge reach, she had one person get angry, tell her she was stealing from everyone else, and that she was dishonest etc. Of course Julie was hurt to the core, offended, and deeply saddened. I warned her to not let the drama take her away from what she needed to be doing, but the thing blew up among her team.

Of course Julie had done everything right, covered her bases, been completely open and transparent, and did nothing to take anything away from anybody. Her day, every day, is spent in giving. That is why she succeeds.

But what I hoped for, for Julie, happened. She not only didn't get angry and send poison messages, but she simply felt sadness and love for the person sending the hate. She didn't let the drama put her in a swamp of poison and take away her precious time. Admittedly, I did see it suck a lot of energy away from her - energy she needed desperately to be doing other things. But out of it all she gained greatness, love, personal peace and general awesomeness. She accomplished another important step to becoming the powerful and amazing woman that the rest of us already know she is.

I see this in my own stuff as well. Sometimes when things don't go as I planned, I have to remind myself that I'm not always in control, and if things go another way, that might be the path that I should accept - and then move forward - understanding that it may be the Lord's hand.

Now for the scripture. In Alma 62, it talks about the wars with the bad guys - the Lamanites. It also talks about the wars with the other bad guys within the group that should be the good guys. As always, it clearly describes that it's most important to deal with the inner demons than the outer ones. One might say, "well, I'll fight this outer battle and then work on myself when I have time". Negative. No. In many or perhaps most cases, outer battles occur when the inner self is not pure. This is what happened with the Nephites at this time.

In verse 41, it describes the after effects of the war. It had been a long war, where the bad guys had taken a lot of land, and spilled a lot of Nephite blood. It had taken blood, starvation, and the loss of a lot of good lives because the Nephite inner vessel wasn't clean. Finally it ends. Verse 41: "But behold, because of the exceedly great length of the war between the Nephites and the Lamanites many had become hardened, because of the exceedingly great length of the war; and many were softened because of their afflictions, insomuch that they did humble themselves before God...".

Now that I type that, I see the same phrase twice. This might be the center of a chiasm, but I'm not going to go searching for it. I'm doing something else right now.

What I do see is that "many had become hardened", and "many were softened". Actually that's probably the second leg of the chiasm, but I'm going elsewhere.

Where I'm going is this: the same event - the war - caused some to be hardened, and some to be softened. The same event. It wasn't the war that causes hardness, it's our choices. It's us. This horrific event still isn't, as the stoics would say, evil by itself, it just is. What's good or evil is how we respond to it.

Of course there are extremely evil people who cause all kinds of damage, and they will pay whatever price the Lord determines for their actions, but that doesn't mean that we are controlled by their choices. We can still choose greatness - or not - for ourselves.

And Helaman knew this. I think it's awesome that after things get smoothed over, the war is won, and life is good, Helaman doesn't get comfortable. In verse 45, "Therefore, Helaman and his brethren went forth, and did declare the word of God with much power unto the convincing of many people of their wickedness...". The time for cleansing the vessel is not just for when there is crisis - it's for all the time. That way you can either avoid the crisis altogether or make its length and effects much less damaging.

I am the master of my fate, 

      I am the captain of my soul. - Wm Henley

I believe that greatness is gained when we wrest control and responsibility of our lives from those who we have given it to improperly. If anyone but the Lord is captain of our ship, it will flounder and sink. May we first completely own our own souls, then give it to the Lord. Greatness awaits.

Evil punishes itself

So I don't think that today's thought is self contained - it's just an exploration of a thought I've been working on recently. That thought is that the Lord doesn't have to punish us for not doing the right things. Instead, our actions end up becoming their own punishment because they separate us from God, and that separation and its natural consequences become painful.

I'm reading in Alma Chapter 50. Here we have a dude named Morianton who started as apparently the leader of a city, and he had a border dispute that got heated. So the other side gets nervous and goes to the general (Moroni) for protection (for they were not in the wrong).

So now, Morianton is nervous that he's gonna get wiped out, so he plans to take his army north. This would make the good guys (Nephites) hemmed in like an oreo between two sets of bad guys. Not what you want if you're a Nephite leader.

Does the Lord stop this? Perhaps in a roundabout way. Morianton showed his manliness by beating one of his maid servants much, as it says in verse 30. She then goes to Moroni and reveals the plan. So if Morianton was really a man and didn't beat this servant, he might have gotten away with things? Perhaps. But if he was really a man, he might not be the bad guy. Men know where there power comes from, and it doesn't come from beating on women.

This is an example to me of evil condemning itself.

It's also an example to me that the inner self needs to be far more closely examined, especially in times of difficulty, than the outer. As I write this, there is great division and even hatred as relates to the president. Barack Obama I think was the first president to despise the country he presumably led and served. Half the country noticed that, and then elected a polar opposite man who channeled their fears and hatred. But the problem is that Trump is all about serving himself, and is probably no better a man than his predecessor. Families split apart, and long time friends can no longer communicate with each other.

But who sits in the chair thousands of miles away is so meaningless compared to what is happening in our own homes. Our personal success and happiness has far more to do with how often and earnestly we pray, how we request, listen for and respond immediately to personal guidance. It's more about seeking the Lord through obedience and love. But being vehement about the president is absolutely easier - it doesn't require us to do anything to improve ourselves.

Verse 22: "And those who were faithful in keeping the commandments of the Lord were delivered at all times."

ch 51 v 16: "For it was his first care to put an end to such contentions and dissensions among the people." This, speaking of Moroni. He knew that an external enemy cannot be successfully dealt with if the inner self is not clean. You can't rely on the Lord to help you beat the bad guys if you're not the good guy. When that happens, your chances are closer to 50/50 and you're, as the scriptures say, "ripe for destruction".

A destruction we bring on to ourselves physically, because we have already destroyed ourselves spiritually. May we choose the Lord instead.